How Leaders Stop Conflict and Create Harmony

Author: Dr. Vesna Grubacevic

When was the last time you had a disagreement, misunderstanding or conflict with your team, colleague, customer or supplier? Do you find yourself getting stressed, frustrated, angry, upset or anxious when you communicate with other people in business?

Why is effective communication so important?

As leaders, it is our role to show others the way, to set a good example that they can then follow, to inspire and motivate them. Effective leaders are effective communicators and they know how to get the very best performance from other people.

Effective communication improves harmony between leaders and their teams, customers and suppliers, and creates greater synergy in any business relationship. In addition, effective communication reduces errors, rework and blame, and helps us to be more productive. Research has also shown that anytime we have a pleasant experience it increases our immune system, while an unpleasant experience can reduce our immune system. So by making our communication more pleasant without stress, anxiety, frustration, hurt or anger, we are also having a positive impact on our productivity, as well as our health and overall wellbeing.

Below is a simple and effective communication technique that will assist you to be a more effective leader and to clearly communicate your message to your team, colleagues, customers and suppliers.

Respecting the differences

Often when we speak with other people we find ourselves saying the same thing, only in a different way because we use different words. By understanding the different personalities in your business relationships with other people, you can stop conflict and create harmony instead. One simple and effective way to achieve this is to understand how your team members, colleagues, customers and suppliers communicate.

There are four different styles of communication: Visual, Auditory, Kinesthetic and Auditory Digital. While most people use a combination of all these communication styles, each person has a preference for one or two styles over the others. Importantly, each communication style has its own “language”.

Words that appeal to people with a:

visual preference include: see, look and show
auditory preference include: hear, listen and discuss
kinesthetic preference include: feel, touch and grasp
auditory digital preference include: think, study and understand.

Avoiding Conflict

Conflict often occurs when people use their own preferences when communicating, and when the preferences of the two people are different. For example, if one person uses Auditory digital words and the other person uses kinesthetic words. The person with an auditory digital preference may complain that they do not understand the person with a kinesthetic preference, and that they take too long to get to the point.

The person with a kinesthetic preference may complain that the other person never makes time to connect with them and their feelings, and may, as a result, feel left out or disengaged. This could result in the person with a kinesthetic preference withdrawing their business connection, which could sour the business relationship. In turn, this could spiral into a disempowering dynamic between the two people, and all because of a difference of communication style.

Creating Harmony

In any business relationship, when you tailor the words you use to match the other person’s preferred communication style, this will greatly assist them to clearly see, easily get in touch with and understand what you are saying, and will help to avoid disagreements.

The best way to create harmony is to really listen to the words your team members, colleagues, customers and suppliers use. Really pay attention to their language and notice the words that they are using. Then use the same words back in your reply to them.

Imagine really listening to your team members, customers, and suppliers from now on and using their style when communicating with them. Notice the difference this will make to your communication, leadership, and how it improves the harmony in your business relationships.

Dr. Vesna Grubacevic is an author, speaker, media commentator, the founder and Performance Transformation Expert^® with award-winning company, Q^t. She is the creator of breakthrough behavioural change techniques, holds a PhD, a BEc and has over 35 years’ business experience, including working directly with CEOs, senior executives and their teams to assist them to create exceptional results. Her Amazon best-selling book, Stop Sabotaging Your Confidence, has also been gifted to Hollywood and Australian award winners, nominees, hosts and celebrities. For additional free resources please visit www.qttransformation.com